Empty threats.

At yesterday's birthday party I was talking to a couple of mums about how to manage undesirable toddler behaviour, what techniques work for them etc. Since LV moved up a class at nursery all I ever seem to hear from her is:
'You're not my best friend...'
'You're not being very kind'
'I'm not happy'
'It's not fair'
'NO'
So I know that she's just parroting the words she hears at nursery but I'm quite keen to set some boundaries and actually follow through on the consequences that I negotiate with. Previously I have made empty threats....:
'Right, they'll be no playing with your friends tomorrow at nursery' (Without taking a day off work I cannot follow through on this one)
'Right, they'll be no cafe Nero this weekend' (I can't get through the weekend without an Almond Croissant...it's my highlight!)
'Right, well, Santa will need to know about this' (lies, and a bit mean really)

It became apparent during this chat that I was the only one who didn't follow through with the threats they made...ouch, bad mum raising undiciplined child.

So, after the party when LV refused to listen to my simple instruction not to keep putting the tie of a balloon in her mouth I asked her:

 Me 'Do you want mummy to put that balloon in the bin?'
LV 'Yes';
Me 'Really, because if you keep putting it in your mouth I will have to pop it and put it in the bin'
LV 'Yes, put it in the bin'
Oh my God....Really?! She was testing me....yuk yuk, my three year old is manipulating me. She puts the balloon in her mouth again.
Me 'Right bring me that balloon please'
LV 'Ok, here you go'

I walk into the kitchen, pop the balloon and put it in the bin, queue wails....tears.....pleas (too late)....I feel awful and a bit panicked....did I go too far...will she hate me forever? Hopefully not. Hopefully she won't put another balloon tie in her mouth, if she does, hopefully the mention of popping it will deter her from doing it again because now she knows I'll do it? I win because I'm true to my word? hmmmmmm the winning doesn't feel very good. Thankfully she wasn't bothered for long, maybe I'll just never let her touch another balloon again...that way I won't have to make the threat, follow through on the threat or appear weak by not following through on the threat. Simple. No more balloons, ever, easy. Phew, glad that one's resolved now GET THAT STICKER OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!!! ahhhhhhhh

xo.